Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Break Down

So I totally had a minor (slightly major) breakdown a few nights ago. I think that was my "rock bottom" because I feel so much better since then. I'm much more accepting of everything and small issues (that aren't even issues) aren't becoming huge deals anymore. I don't cry everyday at school anymore. I figured out if I take 3 winter classes and 3 summer classes I could finish this coming summer. I don't know about 3 winter classes, though. I have an advising appointment tomorrow in the morning so I'm going to see how ridiculous that seems to them and go from there. I would much rather suffer for a short period and finish early. I'd be 21 when I graduate!

I've been running every day in between classes and it is wearing me out. It makes me feel SO much better mentally because it gives me time to think and figure out stuff in my head but it makes me so tired and my muscles are killing me! Hopefully that goes away the more I do it. I've been running in the park so I guess I'll just have to go to the WREC center instead when it starts raining. I'm hoping to lose 10 lbs (at least) by Halloween! We'll see :D

Relationship is good...I think me not being a crazy bitch is helping us out a lot. :-P He's also trying really hard to and I see it, so that helps. I'm not upset about him having a 2nd job anymore. It's only 2 nights a week anyhow. Still don't like crazy drunk sluts at his 2nd job though... oh well. He's mine, not theirs. :)

Work has been the only thing that has been consistently good for the past few months. It's nice.

New Anberlin album came out yesterday and I absolutely adore it! To me, the theme of it kind of says, "here i am, take me or leave me." I like it.
New Trapt album on Oct. 12!! They've been releasing a couple songs here and there and I love them all! I cannot WAIT! I especially can't wait til they start touring. :D :D:D:D:D I'm going to drag Mac along with me...he said he's never been to a real concert before! I shall change that. :)

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

"hold the cap or it will get all over the ceiling!"

So Mac thought that he was supposed to work tonight from 6-12 so I didn't think I was really going to get to see him until later in the week but then he called me on my way home from my Grandma's and apparently he was just going today for another interview. So we hung out and we went to 5 & I for some food after we took him shoe shopping (:D). I ordered french fries so when we sat down I grabbed the bottle of ketchup and shook it and the cap flew off and splattered all over my hand and the table! I immediately remembered my dad always yelling at me to make sure and hold the cap to the ketchup or it would get everywhere. I told Mac that my dad was saying hello. :)

Today was really sucky in the beginning. I totally had a break down in the library while attempting to do my homework. I was texting Ben with all my problems and he made me feel a little better because he understands EVERYTHING. I eventually made it through my second class and went to my grandma's and my sister ended up being there too. We all had dinner and I got to vent everything out on my grandma. She always has a way to make things a positive so that really helped me, on top of being able to vent some more. Then I get a call from Mac and that just made my whole day because I just really needed a hug and Mac is such a good hugger. Plus he's just so happy all the time and I really just needed something like that today. Everyone, especially Mac, helped turn my day from an "i hate the world" day to an "i love everything" day. I wish I had a better way to say thank you to everyone other than just "thank you."

Hopefully tomorrow is better.
20 days 'til I'm 21. 501 days until I graduate. 197 days until winter break. I guess I could look at this as something to look forward too.



Hi back, Dad. Love you and miss you!